Hometown hookups sure add the perfect dazzle to the holiday chaos. Whether you’re interested in an old high school bae or navigating your way to new options, you deserve to prioritize fun. To help you achieve those stress-free orgasms, we tapped Lovehoney’s cheeky sex expert Bobby Box for some house dating advice.
Keep reading for your exclusive tips.
What’s the best way to let someone know you’re interested in dating when you get home?
I’ve always been a fan of the franchise. I think in our time we all do. There are too many sexual options available these days to dance around whatever you want. Reach out to the DMs and make it clear that you’d like to hook up with them when you return. If that sounds too direct, you can say “we should see each other when I get back” because that’s still suggestive and at least shows interest. If you haven’t spoken in a while, this message might be obvious as to what you’re really asking. This is the ideal scenario.
What should be done to prepare before returning home for a hometown hookup?
Sometimes coming home is stressful. Maybe you didn’t have the best experience growing up, maybe you miss your privacy, maybe your uncle is vocally against abortion and you want to rip your ears out.
Sex can help relieve some of the stress of coming home, so I totally agree, personally. But I understand that sex itself can cause anxiety, especially with a hometown connection that you may have a history with.
First, you need to find yourself a family-free space. The last thing you want is for someone’s grandma to catch you on all fours. Second, pack a discreet bag with your sex essentials. Condoms, lubricant, toys, prepare them in advance. It makes it easier and saves a trip to the local CVS where you’ll probably run into at least four people you know. Finally, pack something that brings you comfort, because the holidays are stressful and stress can impair sexual function and satisfaction.
What are the red flags or clear signs that it’s time to pack up and go?
I would say those are the same red flags you would apply to anyone. Red flags are boundaries and people should always respect them. If at any point you don’t want to continue or are doubting yourself, pack your bags and leave.
Any ideas for places to hang out the first time you meet?
I have always been a fan of the bar or the cafe. It’s public, unassuming and every town has one. It’s also an easy place to chat and test chemistry. Since there will most likely be a bar or cafe near one of you, this makes for a quick and inexpensive meetup with a short drive to where you’re going to have fun. Of course, it all depends on whether and how well you know the person. If you know each other well, just invite them over and tell them you want to watch a movie.
Any tips for having safe sex if you share accommodation?
If there’s no way to find an empty house, there are some things you can do to reduce the likelihood of others hearing. First, you can choose a time when people are less likely to actively listen, such as the middle of the night or very early in the morning.
You can also drown out any sexual sounds with music, TV, or even a white noise machine. If your bed frame is making a lot of noise, take it somewhere else. Put a mattress, blankets or pillows on the floor and roll over there. Pillows are also useful if you tend to be loud in the throes of passion. Another option is to go for the external route rather than penetration, as these acts tend to be much quieter.
How do you keep the hometown hookup in your hometown – respectfully?
Interact with them on your social networks. Like their stories, leave the weird comment on a TikTok. Just stay friendly. You don’t have to talk all the time, but the occasional check-in wouldn’t hurt. Anything more than that sounds like a crush. And it’s not a crush, it’s a hometown encounter. Unless…